Thursday, September 17, 2015

What does fit really mean?

I have not kept up with this as much as I planned when I started this blog.  Lately I have been doing some thinking about what being a "fit mom" looks like to me.  When I started this, it was about loosing weight and getting "fit" in the traditional sense.  Vainly I wanted to look good!  Lately thought I'm finding that I want to be "fit" in all areas - physically, mentally, and spiritually.  Physically I still have a TON to do but I know it can be done.  I have been suffering from depression and anxiety, so mentally I have areas to work on as well.  Spiritually I want my relationship with God to be stronger.  I want to know the bible better so that I have the ability to help lead others, especially my family, to God.  I believe that if I have all three areas in order ("fit") that life will be that much better.  Each area will help improve the other leading to a more balanced life.  The overall look/feel of the blog will likely not change because I had always planned on being a pretty open book but I wanted to share then change in my view and what I'm hoping to accomplish in my life.

Saturday, August 22, 2015

3 Months Later

It has been 3 months since my last post.  I'm not proud of this at all. I do have a few things I am proud of and a few revelations as well.  

Lets start with the rest of May!  I continued to stay mostly on plan with my food and I worked out here and there.  Around the end of May to early June, I hit the 15 pound mark and this was pretty darn exciting! 15 pounds gone!  At the beginning of June the kids and I headed to Granbury to spend some time with my family and possibly go on a trip with them.  Once we were in Granbury I started to cough and I knew right away that it was bronchitis again. I also knew that if I hadn't been coughing for at least 10 days that the doctor wouldn't do anything. We were gone for about a week and a half.  We traveled to West Texas and had a great time. I continued to watch what I was eating but aside from walking, there wasn't much exercising going on.  Later in June I went to the doctor and started to get better. 

I had good intentions in July but the time got away from me and I still wasn't feeling great.  I have endometriosis and the pain I have with it is starting to get really bad again. I had surgery in August of 2002 and slowly the pain is getting bad again.  With August has come preparing for our son to start kindergarten and all the emotions that go with this new chapter.  Through all of this though I'm very proud to say that I have maintained a 12 pound loss. I was feeling slightly bloated when I weighed too.  I have tried a couple of times to get back on track but I have failed myself.  Aaron and I like working out together but he has worked some extremely crazy hours.  I have to just workout when I can and let him workout when he gets home while I prepare dinner.  I know Aaron will have success just by me having a great dinner cooked, giving him his shakeology in the morning and sending him to work with a great lunch.  From there hopefully we can workout again together as the schedule allows. 

Today I have seen one of my favorite bible verses posted by people I know.  I'm guessing God is trying to tell me something. The verse is Phillipians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your mind in Christ Jesus." 
I started off so strong and had some great results.  I continued to loose weight and then I slowly started to sabotage myself.  I'm beginning to think that I have a fear of meeting my weight goal.  I have a LOT to loose and I worry about what will happen if I have excess skin.  My first results have given me nothing to worry about but I worry anyway.  I think that I will never look as good as I did before, so why bother.  But this is a lie to some degree.  Yes I have stretch marks and yes I may end up with excess skin but that doesn't mean that I can't look good and feel good in my skin.  Sure I may have to wear a one piece swimsuit with board shorts from now on but I know when I'm smaller again I will feel much better in that than I do now in the same thing.  I will feel better in my clothes and I long for the day that I feel comfortable in shorts again.  Texas is HOT!  My husband is the only person besides myself that I care about when it comes to being naked and he loves me now.  That maybe TMI but it is the truth and that is how it should be.  I'm very grateful for his support though all of this and I pray that we will be working out together again soon instead of at different times.  The bible verse has always been a favorite but it is a great reminder to turn my worries of failure and success to God.  I just need to keep going for my healthy and sanity and the health and sanity of my family.  God will take care of the rest.

Monday, May 11, 2015

Round 1 Done!

We we finish our first round of the 21 Day Fix! My stats are not quite what I had hoped but I am still happy. Mother's Day weekend put us back a little but I'm ok with that and I'll explain why in just a few minutes.

Every year we have a family crawfish boil and it normally falls around Mother's Day. We decided this year that we would stay the night in Galveston. We ended up going to Beaumont on Sunday to see Aaron's grandmother as well. I had prepared some fruit to take with me on Saturday to keep me away from the cookies but I forgot it at home in the rush to get out the door for soccer. I had packed a couple of Dr Peppers to have over the weekend and I really wish I hadn't! I had only had 1 or 2 over the last month or so until this weekend. I stayed away from the potatoes and corn but I did have several cookies. After we got the kids down, I headed to my sister-in-laws to watch a movie and I ended up dropping Aaron off at a cook-off to hang out with his best friend that he hadn't seen in a while. When I called Aaron to let him know that I was heading out to pick him up, he talked me into staying out a while longer. I wasn't real happy at first because I was tired and I knew that it would also mean that I would be waking up with the kids in the morning. I'm really glad that we went out though. It was fun to see friends and just have fun. We don't go out much and we don't really go to bars when we do get to go out. We ended up at a bar and had fun dancing. We got back to Aaron's parents around 3 and I was laying down around 3:30. Our daughter woke up at 5:30. I got them back down but didn't fall asleep again until after 6 and by 6:45-7 the kids were ready to get up. We had a Mother's Day lunch out and I tried to make the best choice. I can tell you that I am not eating as much as I had been and that is great. I did drink 2 or 3 Dr Pepper's because I was so tired. We got home late and grabbed McDonald's for dinner. We made better choices than we might have before but we didn't feel good last night. 

Now for why I'm ok with not being where I thought I might be at the end of the 21 days. The way we felt last night and how we have been feeling this morning just reinforces why we are doing this and how important what we eat is to feeling our best. We both knew that we had been feeling better and happier since we started but this set back just shows how important food is in addition to the exercise. I'm not saying we won't ever have another not so good weekend but they won't happen as often that is for sure! This morning we were both still really tired but we got up and got moving. We both wanted to get back at it and start round 2 strong. This time we will finish just as strong! We are also planning on doing the yoga fix most evenings to help us relax and hopefully sleep better. 

Now time for my results! I had been hovering around 8 pounds down and ended up loosing 7 pounds and 8.25 inches. I know my bra fits differently but I'm not sure I did a good job measuring my chest the first time so that measurement stayed the same. While I had hoped for more (probably not all that realistic though) I am happy because my clothes are fitting differently, I feel stronger and I'm feeling a little more confident. I have a long way to go all the way around but I feel like I can get there for once! I may not be ready for shorts this summer but next summer I will be!

Anyone want to do a round (or more) with me?!?

Monday, May 4, 2015

Two weeks done!

We are done with the first two weeks and we are on to our third and final week of our first round. The first week was tough but the second week was better. I'm feeling stronger, more confident and happier. My clothes are fitting a little different and people have noticed a difference in Aaron!

We started off with evening workouts and then moved to mornings early in the first week due to evening events. It has been hard some mornings to get up but we are always glad that we got up to workout. The hardest part for me so far was this past weekend because Aaron was gone and it was my first time to workout alone. I did it though and I'm glad I did the workouts.

I got my Mother's Day gift early! We went to Target for some groceries and a swimsuit for our son but we came out with a Ninja blender too! Target had the big one with the more powerful motor, food processor and two cups marked down. I used it this morning to make a shake and I may make a fruit smoothie for my afternoon snack. I love how much easier it is to clean and how much lighter it is than my old one.

Two weeks in and I would still recommend the 21 Day Fix. I'm still doing some modified moves but I can tell I'm getting stronger and more flexible. I'm about 8 pound down and I believe Aaron is in the 10 pound range. The third week has workouts twice a day and I'm excited to see where we finish!

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

21 Day Fix!

We have started the 21 Day Fix and I am loving it so far! I'm SORE but I love it and I have actually been looking forward to working out. I'm really hoping this feeling sticks around. 

Aaron and I made a deal that I have to be 100% committed to the program and he will do his best to be 100% as well. I am pretty much in charge of food, if I make it and pack it for him then he will eat it! It hasn't been that hard to adjust so far but it does take some planning and thinking. When I'm deciding what I will have for lunch or a snack, I'm thinking about what I'm planning for dinner. Today is day 3 but I feel great about being able to follow the program and not stopping.

Monday and Tuesday we did our workouts when Aaron got home from work. I had everything ready to go so that when he walked in the door he just had to go changes clothes and we could start. Wednesday our son has soccer practice, so we had to get up early to get the workout done for the day. 12 hours after starting our last workout, we were starting another! I like mornings because the day can't get in the way but I like evening ones to for the stress release from the day. This week is busy so we will be finishing out the week with morning exercises. Aaron has a couple of weekends coming up that he will be away so I will have to do those workouts on my own. While I am committed to doing this regardless, I will miss having him to workout with those weekends. It really does help to have him doing this with me. 

One thing I really like about the workouts is that there is a person dedicated to doing modified moves. You are encouraged to do a modified move if you are having a hard time which is nice. She just wants you to keep moving and to strive to get better. This is something I find comforting and I will admit that I have been doing some of the modified moves! I am really sore so I know even the modified moves are working! I'm excited to see where I end up at the end of the 21 days. 

As I have said in previous posts, I have a lot of weight to loose so I know I will be doing multiple rounds of the 21 day fix. My hope is that after I get some or most of the weight off that I can go back and try p90x3 again. No matter, what I see this program as one that I will use to help me maintain once the weight is gone. I'm looking forward to the next update and I hope that I still have the positive view that I do now! I fully expect that I will!

Monday, April 13, 2015

Updates galore!

Well I have several updates and all are good! 

I'll start with sodas. We both went 3 weeks without soda when we decided to have one when we went out to eat. We both agreed that it didn't taste that great and that we both felt yucky after our early dinner. We ate at Chuy's and probably ate more than we should have, but we have done that since we had stopped sodas but we felt worse this time. The following day was Easter and we all went to my awesome sister-in-law's house. Aaron decided to have a bottled Diet Coke with breakfast and I had a bottle Dr Pepper after lunch. Again we both agreed that it just didn't taste a good as it did before. This was really encouraging to me because I no longer have the cravings that I would have here and there and I think those cravings went down because the drink just didn't taste that great. We have both had one here and there but it still doesn't taste that great. We have really only had one if we end up getting fast food and it comes with a drink. I'm drinking 99% water and I think Aaron is pretty much doing the same. 

Now for an update on Aaron's follow up doctor appointment. His blood work came back fine so that is really good. His echocardiogram showed something (he wrote it down but I don't have the name with me) that can be bad but thankfully it doesn't look as bad for Aaron. It is something that has about a 50% chance of being passed to the kids though so his doctor suggested that our kids have an echo. The doctor also asked if Aaron's parents have had echos and if he could get copies of the results. Now for the part that Aaron doesn't like - he is having to wear a monitor for 30 days. I feel bad but I'm thankful that the doctor is doing what he can to figure out what caused the previous episode. He told Aaron that he thinks he can fix the problem if he can figure out what caused it to happen. He goes back May 8th and I know he is probably counting down the days! 

I'm nearly done with my 30 days on Shakeology and while I don't have anything amazing to report, I don't have anything bad to report. I can't decide if it has really helped to increase my energy or reduce my cravings. Maybe I'm just so overweight, tired and depressed that it is hard for me to notice. I guess if I notice a difference when I am off of it for several days then I'll know! I do not like using my blender everyday (it does taste better with ice and some peanut butter - for the chocolate) but now I'm just using my blender bottle. It doesn't taste as good but it is faster and clean up is less! 

My exercise has not been going well but that is about to change! I have been looking at the 21 day fix and got a surprise that it is on the way to me! I'm hoping for several things with the program but my biggest are:
-loose weight and inches, I have a lot to go so I know it will take several rounds
-feel comfortable in my skin - this hasn't happened in a long time
-be able to wear my wedding rings and my Aggie ring again
-be able to shop at the stores I like and feel comfortable in shorts and tank tops. 

More than anything I want to feel comfortable with how I look. Growing up I always had issues with my legs and of course I would give anything to have those legs back! I think the only times I have been 100% comfortable with how I look was when I was pregnant. I was amazed both times with what my body was doing and what it was about to do. I hated being sick for over half of each of my pregnancies but I really did love being pregnant. I haven't felt comfortable in shorts since my first year of college when I was 17-18 and I have been wearing capri pants ever since. I would LOVE to feel comfortable in shorts. Texas gets HOT and our area gets HUMID! I also really really want to be able to wear my wedding rings and my Aggie ring again. I miss them both very much! I worked hard for my Aggie ring and I miss people being able to know that I'm also an Aggie. Sounds silly but I want people to know that I'm an Aggie and not just an Aggie fan because my husband is an Aggie. We bleed maroon in this house. Aaron has said that if he was being mugged that he would hand over his wedding band before his Aggie ring! I haven't been able to wear it since I was pregnant with Alex and I haven't been able to wear my wedding rings together since about the same time. I wore just my band for a while but it has been a little over a year since I have been able to wear it :(

My last update is that I registered our son for kindergarten!! How is this possible?!? It seems like just yesterday he was born but he will be 5 in August. Time just goes so fast. 

So those are my updates for now. Our 9th wedding anniversary is Wednesday so I may have a post about that and the last 9 years!

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

A Trip to the ER & Some More Progress

I did not write about this last time because it was still pretty fresh. March 12th, Aaron called me to say that his heart was beating really fast and that if it did not stop he was going to go to the ER that is across from his office. I started to get the kids ready so that we could meet him there. He called back saying that he was going and that he would let me know if it stopped on his way. I was trying to stay calm but I was a little freaked out. Aaron does not like to go to the doctor so I knew he had to be concerned for him to willing go to not just a doctor but to the ER. Once he is there he finds out that he is having an SVT (supraventricular tachycardia). His heart rate was 230! While the doctor was listening to his heart and his breathing he converted on his own and his heart rate went down to 90. By the time I got there the doctors had drawn blood and we had to wait on the results. Thankfully the ER let me back for a few minutes but I could not stay with him because the kids were with me. Aaron's dad got there and was able to go back and then keep me company and take the kids if Aaron had to stay overnight. Thankfully he got to come home that afternoon. While in the ER he was advised to cut out caffeine and adjust his diet. He followed up with the cardiologist the next day and has been doing well. 

We have both now cut out sodas and have been soda/caffeine free since Friday March 13th. I have also been working hard to not have sweets. I have a major sweet tooth but I have not really felt the cravings. Even at the store I have not been tempted by the candy at the check out line. I bought some sugar free popsicles and I have only had two. Normally if it is in the house I will eat some everyday until it is gone. God is giving me great strength to do this and stick with it this time! We are also eating out less because it just doesn't satisfy us like food from home does and this also helps our budget!

We finally got the elliptical in the house on Sunday! I'm excited to have it in our room and I'm trying to figure out when I want to work out. Aaron has been going in to work early so I have been getting up early so I can get a shower before the kids get up. I will likely work out while the kids are in school or in the afternoons once I pick them up since Molly doesn't go everyday. I have not lost that much weight but I have noticed my clothes fitting differently. I'm hoping to get some of the weight off and then start training for a half marathon. I have been wanting to do one and I think once I get some of the weight off I will feel that it is a goal I can obtain. 

Friday, March 13, 2015


Well the elliptical still is not in our house but between soccer practice and then going to my parents house for part of the kids spring break, we just ran out of time! It is our big goal for the weekend beside just having fun as a family. I'm hoping the weather will be decent so we can go to the playground or go for a bike ride. Our 4.5 year old is doing awesome on two wheels and our 3 year old is learning to balance on a strider bike. Our son learned on it and was riding on two wheels in just a few days. He was older than our daughter when he learned but she is doing great. I'm excited to ride our bikes to take our son to school next year! I love bike rides and I know it will be fun to go for family rides.

I may not have the elliptical inside yet but I am down about 3 pounds. Not huge but it is nice to see the scale going down. I haven't really tried either. No exercise other than chasing kids :)  All I have done is try to eat less and drink more water. Aaron and I are both cutting out sodas so hopefully that will help some too. I did not win the Shakeology giveaway that I had entered but a girl I have been following on Instagram for a year or so decided to do a focus group and I got in! I am getting a months worth of Shakeology for a discounted price for my review. I'm going to be having it for breakfast every morning or lunch if I decide to have a different breakfast. I'm excited to see how it works for me. I also have printed out abs, arms and squat challenges to do along with the elliptical. 

A girl I follow on Instagram uses the hastag operation love yourself. I may have to adopt it and add the hastag teach our daughters to love themselves. I'm doing this for me and my family but most of all I want my kids, especially my daughter to have a positive body image.

Monday, March 2, 2015

A Friendly Family Competition

After my last post my brother-in-law Andrew approached me about a competition. It is a couples competition with my me and my husband as a team and Andrew and his girlfriend Janet as a team. Below are the terms:

Starts March 1st and ends October 1st
Weights are combined per couple so that individual weights are not know
The couple that looses the most weight gets a kid free dinner on the losers dime. 

That is it! Nice and simple.  We were not all that sure about doing it at first but decided we did not have any thing to loose except weight!  I also figured that the desire to beat his brother would help drive Aaron as well as me. We are about to get the elliptical in our room and I have printed off several elliptical workouts. I have also printed off a squat challenge for me to start in the morning. Sorry Andrew but we are going to beat you!!!

I also had a friend from high school contact me after reading my other posts about becoming a beachbody coach. I have been curious about Shakeology and recently entered a give away for a few packs. I told her that being a coach had not crossed my mind because of the weight I have to loose.  She said it could be a plus because I am going through it with those I would be coaching.  I am not sure about it just yet but it is something that I am going to consider.  Being able to help others would be awesome and the possibility of bringing in a little money is great too.

Tomorrow will be day one of the squat challenge and hopefully the elliptical will be in the house on Wednesday! 

Saturday, February 28, 2015

It has been awhile......

I knew it had been a while since I last posted, I just didn't realize how long!  One reason I had held off was because we had been told that Aaron was going to be one of the newest Jackson Kayak regional team members.  It took a while for it to finally come through and I had hoped to make an announcement on here because I am so proud of my husband!  Once it finally came though we were busy with some other stuff and now here we are, about 3 and a half months since my last post.

Unfortunately I do not have anything great to report in the weight loss department.  I can report that in early December for various reasons (non that are good), I stopped taking my depression medicine. I am still off the medicine and doing well for the most part.  I have moments where I question being off them but I do feel that I'm handling things well. I'm working really hard to think about all the things I am grateful for and to pray. 

I am working hard to get the house organized because we plan on being here for a really long time. We are working hard to get our budget worked out and I know that these things will help me be less stressed.  Aaron and I are working to get our elliptical in the house so that we can both get moving.  I really want to run a half marathon and while a treadmill would be better, an elliptical is what I have to help get me moving when running outside is not an option.  I have never really considered myself a runner. In middle school I could run a pretty quick mile but I don't think I ever ran more than 2 or 3  miles at a time.  It was normally just a mile for a warm up.  I did take a running class when we were in The Woodlands and I was starting to enjoy the time alone with just my thoughts.  I'm hoping to not rely on music while I run except for maybe having it just in case on long run.

Prayers are greatly appreciated as I continue to try and move forward with my exercise and weight loss!